This morning we tackle some steps. I am not kidding you I stopped and cryed with the pain. this can't be right. People can't be expected to do this it seems so inhumane. This hurts so much how can it help? Why won't they just leave me alone? I don't feel ready I am scared. I can't deal with this pain at home alone what is happening?
And then it hits me, withdrawal?
I am being taken off the morphine whether I like it or not and its replaced with a lower dose opiate based pain relief that is given only 2 times a day. My mood dives and I know it.
This afternoon it gets worse. We get word that one of the patients moved out of our bay before I arrived into a private ward died in her room last night. The fear and the sadness is unbelievable. I never met this lady but her death seems so unfair. This is just an orthopaedic ward how can someone die?
To make it worse, my dear and beautiful friend is terrified now of her operation in the morning, And then the drama really begins.
It appears our little princess does not want to go home and her mother refuses to take her. They want her to stay in? I'm sorry what? why? Because they think they are being mistreated, she has not been here as long as some patients - ie me per chance? After the police are called and threaten to arrest them they sulk around for another hour and then quietly leave - no goodbyes or thank yous just waltz off thinking the world owes them a favour.
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