Well today has all been about packing bags, buying pj's and dressing gowns and basically getting things organised for my hospital stay.
The hospital phoned yesterday and said in 3 days time I was to be booked in for surgery. That left me in a whirlwind or organising rota's for who would look after Molly and writing lists of things I needed to buy, pack and leave behind for my family.
I have a list of things to buy to take, buy to leave so I can set up recovery room for when I return and things to organise so my husband can run the home without me.
I am concerned he won't know how to use the washing machine, that Molly will go to preschool with no juice, that they will eat frozen dinners every night and that Molly may miss ballet lessons or Sunday school.
None of these things in themselves are a disaster but today they feel like the most important thing in the world.
So I have cancelled friends who were due to visit this weekend, spent far too much money in Tesco this morning, done my last ballet class with Molly for some time, and packed a huge selection of pants, pj's and books in to my hospital bag.
I have written a list of my friends numbers and what days they are having Molly on the table, a list of where she needs to be on what days and by when and a list of things to do during the time I am away. It all feels so final and so scary.
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